Prayer has been on my mind a lot lately. I’m not sure why, maybe it’s because I’m not as strong in this area as I used to be. Maybe it’s the increased focus on it in the media. I used to think that I was a might prayer warrior – but I’m not sure any more. My foundations have been shaken with our move to Newberry, which while an answered prayer in itself has been difficult at times. God has answered many of my prayers, some in more creative ways than I could have imagined. Some answers took much longer than I would have expected and some, it seems, haven’t been answered. All of this has taken me on a fantastic adventure though.
For 20 plus years, I prayed that my husband would become a man of God – no, not just a man of God, but a mighty man of God. And that dream has come true. My husband has a thirst for God that is unrivaled. His heart breaks for those who are lost. He has developed a deep understanding for the things of God. His thoughts challenge me to dig deeper into God’s word to solidify what it is that I actually believe. But during those years of prayer, God was changing me, too. He was showing me a different version of himself. He was showing me the love and patience that he has for his children. So during this time of prayer for my husband, God was also changing me.
Moving to Newberry was another prayer that God answered for us. What a joy it was to move here, but being here has been a challenge as well. It is hard to make friends and to find a spot in a community where you’re seen as an outsider. Finding a church home has proven difficult and the lack of deep friendships make winters seem extra long. But God is changing me, he is teaching me to cling to him more tightly and to rely on him for all that I need instead of other flawed beings. By relying on Christ for championship and fellowship, I am able to accept the fragility of others and to realize that I may be let down and that’s ok.
There are some prayers – and these are the ones that are challenging me right now – that don’t seem to make it past my ceiling. I pray for revival in Newberry, but God doesn’t seem to be too interested. I know he is and I’m sure he’s putting things in place, but waiting for God’s timing is difficult. I’m impatient and I want to be in control. So even in not yet answered prayers, God is molding and shaping me. I need to be patient and here’s the big one, trust that God knows best. Will I ever learn this truly? Is this a lesson that can be achieved 100%?
Another seemingly unanswered prayer is for my friend who has stage 4 cancer. She is the sweetest, godliest woman you could ever imagine. This is all so unfair. Why should my friend who loves Jesus above all and who has a family that needs her have to deal with this? Lots of giant in the faith have prayed for her healing – why haven’t we seen it? I don’t have answers and to be honest, I’m frustrated. I guess maybe I’m more afraid than frustrated. What if God’s will for my friend isn’t the same plan that I have? Again, that trust thing…
I was reading in Mark (chapter 11 verse 24) the other day. Jesus was telling his disciples that if they had faith they could tell a mountain to move and it would. If we ask, it is done. Now this sounds just a little too much like Santa Claus to me, so I began to investigate. I found out that of course, our requests need to line up with who God is and what he wills, but that we also need faith. So I scrunch up my face and repeat, “I believe…” over and over again. But what if faith is that we will trust God to answer our prayers in the way HE sees fit. What if we bring God our requests and share our hearts, but then let HIM work in the way that is best for everyone concerned. I’m beginning to wonder if this is what faith truly is.
It’s truly a journey when we accept our gift of salvation from Father. It isn’t always easy, but I am learning to trust in the God who loves me and to rest in his plan.
Adventures in Abundance 
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