Turning Adversity into Blessings: Overcoming Being Overlooked

HOPE

Read Genesis 29:30 to learn the story of Jacob and his wives…

Although Jacob was tricked by his father-in-law into marrying Leah he honored his part of the bargain. But Rachel was his love and so a plan needed to be made so that Jacob and Rachel could be together. Jacob worked out a deal with his father in law to earn Rachel as well to be his wife.  Even when we are tricked by others, it is usually good to keep our end of the bargain. God reminds us in His word that we are to keep our oaths. Integrity is important.  It is best that we move forward and allow God to fight our battles for us. 

The Bible tells us that Jacob loved Rachel more than Leah.  What a situation to find yourself in.  Neither woman was happy and fulfilled.  Rachel had the love of Jacob, but she had no children.  Leah had children but her husband didn’t love her. And Jacob, well he was stuck between the proverbial rock and hard place.  How miserable their lives must have been, constantly striving for happiness.  

Have you ever found yourself in a situation like this?  I sure have.  Being the first born, but a girl.  Having the responsibilities of a first born, but not getting the attention that my brother got.  I can relate to Leah.  I tried everything in my power to become what my parents were looking for.  I was responsible and did everything to the very best of my ability.  I tried so hard.  It all turned around when, like Leah, I turned from trying to please my parents and others around me, to pleasing my King.

I Peter 5:7 tells us to cast all our care on God, because He cares for us.  When I did this, my life began to improve.  I was able to establish healthy boundaries and began to recover from trying to please everyone in my world.  I began to relax into the love that God showered on me.  I began to find out who I really am and who God wants me to be.  How wonderfully freeing to live life under God’s watchful gaze. 

If you are feeling overlooked by someone in your life, here are some ideas that you might want to try.

• Speak up for yourself – Let others know how you are feeling.  
• Change your perspective of the situation – Look for the good in your situation. What does being overlooked by someone open up in your life.  Does it give you more freedom to pursue other relationships?
• Examine your abilities – Know the truth about yourself and speak that truth in times of distress 
• Consider if your personality contributes to you being overlooked Can you do anything to put yourself out there to others?  Do you tend shy away from having the spotlight on you?  Consider if you really want the attention that you think you are missing. Look for ways to make yourself more noticeable in ways that work for your personality. 
• Treat others as you would like to be treated – Would you like to be greeted every morning at your job?  Then take the time to tell others good morning as you see them.  Decide how you want to be treated and then treat others in that way and see what happens. 
• Enhance your natural traits – If you’re good at something, then work to improve on that area and let others see what you’re doing.  Are you good at organizing, then show it off.  Offer to help with an organizing task that will benefit others.  
• Take care of yourself – Show yourself some grace and care for you.  Find ways to relax and boost your confidence.  Learn about yourself and the things that you do really well.  Find ways to do those things more often.  Pursue things that make you feel stronger and more confident.  

Being overlooked can be a blessing. Take some time to pray about it and let God show you areas where you can grow and mature. Let Him show you what you’re really good at and ask Him to provide you with opportunities to shine in those areas.  

God’s got your back, He created you just the way you are and He’s all about making sure you’re living your best life. Just lean into Him and roll with Him.